18

Tomorrow is my birthday, and I will be 18. Truthfully, it doesn’t seem real yet! But, as I sit here in my last night of being a minor, I’ve been reflecting on what that number really means.

You see, I have been told in the past few weeks by several people that I’m turning the “magic” 18. The first time someone told me that, I didn’t get it (I’m usually a little slow in getting jokes…). Finally, I figured out that everyone calls it “magic” because you are finally an adult.

Well, I have news for you. “Adult” does not always equal “mature”.

No, really!

Just because I will legally be an adult and I can vote does not mean that overnight I will be responsible and “all grown up”. Overnight, I am not going to hit a phase where I never have to listen to my parents again.

Even if tomorrow I wake up and think about how I’m legally an adult, not much is going to change. I will still be living at home, I will still have a job, I will still play with my siblings. Though the world tells me that, at 18 I can be responsible for my own choices, I have been raised with thought that I have ALWAYS been accountable for my actions. Yes, I may be ready to take on some extra responsibility, but I can’t become prideful and begin thinking that I know everything.

Pride is something I have always struggled with, mostly because I absolutely hate to be wrong. I have often disagreed in a not-so-nice way with my parents and they more often than not, they are right and I am wrong. However, I want to purpose this year to accept the wise counsel of my parents, not turn away from it. So many people that I know reject their parents as soon as they are old enough to leave home. But, I have always found sound advice from my parents, and I don’t want to turn away from them now. When I start college, I know I will need them, as I can become very overwhelmed and stressed. So, while I live at home, I will remember that this is NOT my house. I must be respectful and obedient to my parents all of my days, but especially while I live under their roof. I’m very excited to be growing up (well, I am most of the time, anyway) and I always want to value their generosity and take nothing for granted.

One day, when I marry and move out, I want to remember my time of living at home and learn from the experiences that I had there. My family is wonderful, and I want to pattern my own after them some day. So, Mom and Dad, 18 is just a birthday. It’s a milestone, yes, but I want to always be faithful and kind to you, Noah, Lexi, and Jesus.

Just because tomorrow is a special day, doesn’t mean anything will change. I will always love you and do my best to respect you. I will always value your opinion (even if it takes me a while to come around) and I will always try to submit to your wisdom.

Tomorrow is my birthday, but not much will change. I will still love my Lord, and devote myself to His will. What a wonderful year of life this has been… Although it has been filled with trials, I have learned more than I could ever have imagined. I thank the Lord for his faithfulness and everlasting love.

18 is just a number, and yet it is the beginning of the rest of my life.

“Lord, your discipline is good, for it leads to life and health. You restore my health and allow me to live!” Isaiah 38:16

“ All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is by his great mercy that we have been born again, because God raised Jesus Christ from the dead. Now we live with great expectation, and we have a priceless inheritance—an inheritance that is kept in heaven for you, pure and undefiled, beyond the reach of change and decay.” 1 Peter 1:3-4

Neverland

I’ve been thinking an awful lot about how I am going to have to admit that I am growing up. I am a junior in high school this year, and all I can think about is how much I DON’T want to grow up. I suppose that I am sort of excited for college, but all I really want to do is stay home with my family forever and ever.

I guess what I want is Neverland.

I want to be able to dance forever, always learning and growing in my ability to praise and worship God through ballet and pointe. Knowing I will have to give it up in a year and a half is very difficult for me to swallow. It has been such a part of my life since I was three years old, that I simply can’t bear to think about it.

Maybe I could dance in Neverland.

I want to stay here with my brother and sisters and continue our special dates to get smoothies, books, and ice cream. I want to always be within earshot of them if they should need me. My little brother is about to turn thirteen, and I know there will be trials ahead of him. I only wish I could stay here forever with my wonderful
siblings, so that we could grow in our faith together.

In Neverland.

I have wonderful friends that I know will be going places other than here, and I can’t bear to see us get split up. My dear friend Haley and I have been friends since we met in the library in first grade, and she will be going to the other side of the world to do mission work. I can’t imagine what it will be like to be apart from her for so long. I want us to stay together forever.

Only in Neverland.

I’m afraid. Truly, I am. I don’t know exactly what God has in store for me, but I know that I will have to face many new challenges that I do not think I am ready for. Others tell me that I am ready, but I doubt myself so much. I want a place where I will be accepted readily and can be loved by everyone, a place where I can serve others and bless them as well.

In Neverland.

I suppose what I really want is a place where I don’t have to face my age or maturity. A place where I could sing and dance all day. A place with my friends and family that would always be there for me. A place where I would always be loved and accepted, never an outcast or a stranger. What I want will not exist until heaven, so i will grow up and take on responsibility. I will face the future eventually.

But for now, I can find it in Neverland.

“I have cared for you since you were born. Yes, I carried you before you were born. I will be your God throughout your lifetime – until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.” Isaiah 46:3-4