Cora's Story: Part 2

(Continued from Part 1...)
(Thirty years later…)

“Hannah, come here. Quickly, now!” I yelled. I was weary, and could not bear to call for my child another time. My husband, Michael, was several towns away, looking for work to provide for our family. We were married twenty-five years ago, and have only two children. Hannah and Isaac are good children, though they are often disrespectful and rude. I was nearly past my child-bearing years, and I wished desperately that we had been able to have more children. But God must not have meant it to be so, and I tried to remain content.

For some reason, however, I was always angry about something, and I could not do anything about the bitterness that I carried about within me. Deep inside, I knew that it stemmed from my jealousy of Mary. She had given birth to the “Savior” and he seemed like a perfectly normal child. There was nothing special about him. Although he is grown now, I have yet to see him save the world. Mary had gone on to have eight more children, and I was jealous of her ability to have such a wonderful family.

I have not talked to Mary since that fateful day when she told me of her pregnancy. I let myself stay angry at her, and, even now, I have no intention of forgiving her. What she did was just too wrong for me to let go of. Do I carry a grudge? Perhaps, but she deserves it.

Hannah finally came in from outside, her face red from the cold. She went straight to the fire and began warming her hands and cheeks. I watched my daughter and thought to myself how beautiful she was. Nearly twelve, she was nearing the age of womanhood, when she would think of marrying and leaving me. I tried not to think about it, but I did know that it was inevitable.

“Why were you calling me, Mama?” she asked. “I need you to find Isaac for me. I haven’t seen him all morning,” I said. Hannah nodded and went off in search of her brother. Isaac was forever getting into trouble, though it seemed that trouble usually found him. I sighed at the thought of bringing up such a rambunctious boy, but I knew that Michael was teaching Isaac how to be a man. Though he was only seven, he had a love for life that I admired.

When I watched Isaac laugh so joyously, it made me realize that something inside of me had died; the part that loved life and looked for the good in every situation. Bitterness and anger had become such a part of my routine, that I did not even try to change my ways.

“Mama!” came the cry from outside. I pulled a shawl over my shoulders and hurried outside to see what was the matter. Hannah was hunched over something in our field, and I ran over to see who it was.

It was Isaac. Nearly frozen, he lay collapsed on the ground huddled in a ball. I felt his forehead. It was a fever higher than I had ever felt before.

“No,” I breathed. It couldn’t be my Isaac. My beautiful, lively boy was laying there, closer to death than I had ever seen before. “Hannah! Run and fetch someone. The doctor. Someone!” I yelled. Hannah’s frightened face melted my heart, and I lay a hand on her shoulder to comfort her. As she ran off, I lifted my sweet boy into my arms and carried him inside. I wrapped him in blankets and tried to get him to drink water, but all he could do was moan and tremble.

My son was dying.

Hannah came running back with a man I had not seen in a long while.

It was Jesus. The man who I had come to loathe.

“What are you doing here?!” I screamed. Jesus looked at me calmly, taking my hand and leading me to a chair. I could not speak. Why was he being so kind to me? He went over to Isaac and sat on the pallet next to him. He took my son’s hand and looked at him with a tenderness I had never seen before. Part of me wanted to scream at him to stop touching my boy, but something inside of me stopped and I watched in wonder as he breathed words that I could not hear into Isaac’s ear. What seemed like only a moment later, a short gasp came from Isaac’s lips, and his eyes fluttered open. I hastened to his bedside, and looked into his face.

His fever had broken.

I looked at Jesus in bewilderment, and he looked back at me with eyes that told of something I had never seen before. I still do not know what it was, but I do know that it was something I had never seen in a man here on earth. I looked up to thank Jesus, but he had already gone, slowly shutting the door and leaving without expecting any thanks.

My bitter heart melted only slightly, and I realized that maybe I could be wrong. Months later, I had come to think of the miracle as only a coincidence. Jesus had only been there at the exact moment Isaac’s fever had broken. It wasn’t his doing. It was luck. Chance. Coincidence.

My heart hardened even further, and I thought that nothing could break through the wall I had built around my heart. Nothing could touch me and erase the bitterness encasing my ability to forgive.

Nothing could break me.

Cora's Story: Part 1

(Last year for Christmas I wrote a four-part story from Mary’s perspective about the birth of Jesus. This year, I am going to take a fictional perspective from a young lady named Cora, Mary’s best friend. No, she is not real, but I imagine that Mary must have had somebody like Cora in her life. So, without further ado, here is Cora’s story.)

It was unbearably hot. I could barely breathe from the oppressive heat, much less work inside my dirty, muggy house. I asked my mother if I could take a break and go visit Mary, my best friend. I was given permission, and so I began the five-minute trek to Mary’s home. While I walked I thought of all of the things Mary and I had done together. Since we were knee-high babies, we had played and laughed together. We were never separated for long, and I was grateful to have such a faithful, inspiring friend.

Mary was always sweet and kind, and I had rarely seen her become angry. I trusted Mary completely and knew that she was my faithful friend and confidante. Never had I had a reason to distrust her or doubt her words. After pondering all of this, I had finally reached Mary’s house. I knocked on the door, but no one answered. I could smell bread baking, and I knew that Mary or someone had to be home. I knocked louder, and upon hearing no response, I lightly pushed the door open. Peeking inside, I saw a strange sight.

There was Mary, on her knees in the middle of her family’s house, eyes scrunched shut and tears pouring down her face. I thought that surely something must have happened to her. Had someone hurt her?

“Mary. Mary!” I cried frantically. Her eyes flew open in surprise, and I saw something in her eyes that I had never seen before: wide-eyed wonder. “Mary, what has happened? Is it your family? Say something!” I pleaded. Her mouth opened and closed without uttering a word, and I was clueless as to what had happened to my poor, beautiful Mary.

“It’s all right, Cora. I’m fine. More than fine, actually. I’ve just seen an angel!” Mary said, glowing in a way I had never seen before.

“Mary, you must be feverish! Let me help you to your bed…” I soothed. “No, Cora. I am not feverish. I am with child,” Mary stated calmly. It was now my turn to open and close my mouth soundlessly. My Mary, my pure, honest Mary was pregnant. How? What had she done? Was it her fiancé, Joseph’s fault? Who had done this to her.

She must have seen the thoughts racing through my head as she placed a hand on my shoulder and said, “Cora, I am a virgin still. This baby is born by the will of God. He is allowing me to be the mother of the son of God who will come to save the world from all of this sin and turmoil!”

Something inside of me snapped and I felt bitterness begin to flood my body. “How could you, Mary? How could you lie to my face like this! I may not be married, but I know of the way a child is conceived. That God gave this babe to you is a lie. A lie! How could you convince yourself of such nonsense? Do you really think that Joseph is going to believe that notion? Do you think he will be pleased with your news? I think not. Mary, how can you lie to my face?” I cried, real tears pouring down my face.

“Cora, please! I have not done what you say. I am a virgin!” Mary sobbed, pain and sorrow overshadowing her beautiful features. Anger rose up inside of me, and I shook Mary by the shoulders. “You lie to yourself, Mary. I cannot be friends with a hypocrite,” I said angrily.

Mary’s heart-wrenching sobs only doubled the pain in my heart, and I began to walk to the door. “Mary, I will not be back until you confess your sin and stop lying to yourself. I am no longer your friend,” I said coldly.
I put one foot outside the door and Mary said quietly, “One day, you will see, Cora. One day, you will know that I carry the Messiah.”

Bitterness hardened my heart and I sent one last angry look at Mary before stepping outside and slamming the door. My sweet Mary was a hypocrite and I would never look at her again. Never.
To be continued…

Neverland

I’ve been thinking an awful lot about how I am going to have to admit that I am growing up. I am a junior in high school this year, and all I can think about is how much I DON’T want to grow up. I suppose that I am sort of excited for college, but all I really want to do is stay home with my family forever and ever.

I guess what I want is Neverland.

I want to be able to dance forever, always learning and growing in my ability to praise and worship God through ballet and pointe. Knowing I will have to give it up in a year and a half is very difficult for me to swallow. It has been such a part of my life since I was three years old, that I simply can’t bear to think about it.

Maybe I could dance in Neverland.

I want to stay here with my brother and sisters and continue our special dates to get smoothies, books, and ice cream. I want to always be within earshot of them if they should need me. My little brother is about to turn thirteen, and I know there will be trials ahead of him. I only wish I could stay here forever with my wonderful
siblings, so that we could grow in our faith together.

In Neverland.

I have wonderful friends that I know will be going places other than here, and I can’t bear to see us get split up. My dear friend Haley and I have been friends since we met in the library in first grade, and she will be going to the other side of the world to do mission work. I can’t imagine what it will be like to be apart from her for so long. I want us to stay together forever.

Only in Neverland.

I’m afraid. Truly, I am. I don’t know exactly what God has in store for me, but I know that I will have to face many new challenges that I do not think I am ready for. Others tell me that I am ready, but I doubt myself so much. I want a place where I will be accepted readily and can be loved by everyone, a place where I can serve others and bless them as well.

In Neverland.

I suppose what I really want is a place where I don’t have to face my age or maturity. A place where I could sing and dance all day. A place with my friends and family that would always be there for me. A place where I would always be loved and accepted, never an outcast or a stranger. What I want will not exist until heaven, so i will grow up and take on responsibility. I will face the future eventually.

But for now, I can find it in Neverland.

“I have cared for you since you were born. Yes, I carried you before you were born. I will be your God throughout your lifetime – until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.” Isaiah 46:3-4

He Can

There are a lot of things that I am struggling with right now. Not necessarily huge things, but they are things that are challenging me all the same. Many times when I have confided in someone, they respond with the usual, “You can do it!” But guess what?

I can’t.

Nope, not at all. I’m not being negative here, I’m just stating the fact. I am a sixteen year old girl that can’t do anything. By myself, that is… Thankfully, God can do what I am unable to do, and I could not be more grateful to Him.

This week I really struggled with the classes I am taking at the college this year. I have been very intimidated by English and Sociology, mostly because I feel so YOUNG. I was confident that I could succeed in the classes – until I started them, anyway. When I began my sociology class, I began to see all the different and strange opinions that these college students have. Sure, some of them agree with mine, but the majority of the opinions differ greatly from my opinions on life, faith, and God. I cried several times over the fact that this class is HARD. I felt totally unprepared for the strange topics I was given to write about. My mom helped me figure the class out, and I spent a few hours working on it. Through those hours, I prayed on and off for God’s help in this class. “God, help me be a witness. God, please help me to get a good grade. God, don’t let them be mad at me!” – these were the prayers running through my head. And then I realized something.

I can’t do this by myself. I am UNABLE. But, God can. He can help me when I feel afraid, when my beliefs are attacked, and when I am downcast. I can’t do it on my own!

I can’t, but He can.

There was also a time this week when I had to defend my faith harder than I have ever had to before. I argued and rationalized and witnessed for several hours, not realizing that I was missing a very important element. I was trying to witness and get this person to realize how very real God is, and I was trying to do this all by myself.

And guess what? I can’t. It is not up to me to convince a person to believe in God. It is not up to me to make someone believe. That is what God can do. It is NOT MY JOB. I am a messenger, yes, and I am here to plant seeds, but ultimately God will have to change that person’s heart.

I can’t, but He can.

Sometimes I feel very alone. Very scared. Very confused. Yes, I have friends, but a lot of times I do not call on them, or they are busy. I huddle in my room and throw a pity party, not realizing something very important.

I can’t face the trials in my life alone. I can’t do it BY MYSELF. I will be lonely all my life if I do not turn to Jesus when I am afraid.

I can’t do it alone, but He can help me.

I am so thankful that I am not alone. I have no words to describe the wonderful feeling of trust, faith, and hope all wrapped up in my love for Jesus and His love for me. I am so glad that God is big enough to save me from my sins. To save ME, a helpless and incapable young girl from loneliness.

Thank you, Jesus.

I can’t, but You can.

All the Right Things

Our world today has so many negative and false views of Christianity today, that it is hard for others to know what is really right and true about the life of a Christian. For instance, it is commonly believed that most Christians are hypocrites and do not really live the life that they claim to.

Is that statement true? Do the majority of Christians really use the “do as I say, not as I do” mentality?

Unfortunately, I think it is somewhat common among Believers. No, the majority is not lying about their faith, but the fact that there are still some that do not follow what they claim is truth. Because of these people, though, it taints the world’s view of Christianity.

We were driving to church the other day, and I began looking around at all the houses in my neighborhood. I made a comment to my mom that we did not even know half of the people living in the houses next to ours. I began thinking about how we did not know there stories and whether or not they knew Jesus.

We arrived at church, which is not even two minutes from our house, and I began thinking about all the opportunities I have to invite my neighbors to church. I get so wrapped up in my own bubble, my own life, that I forget to think about others and what I can do for them.

It is so easy as a Christian to say all the right things about your walk with God, while completely forgetting that there are millions of people all around you that need to find the love of Jesus! It is so sad that for so long, people have walked around doing and saying all the right things, yet forgetting to reach out to others!

I am trying to make that change in my own life. I want to love Jesus, do what is right, and reach out to people all at the same time. At work, home, church, and even the grocery store there are opportunities to touch someone’s life!

Instead of living in your own “Christian bubble”, we need to try and touch the people around us in a way that may plant a seed that will later blossom into a relationship with Christ. If this means praying with or without your family when you go to a restaurant, do it. If it means smiling and being kind to those around you, do it. If it means praying for someone who looks like they are in need, do it.

There are opportunities all around us, but if we only say the right things and yet do not live it, then all our efforts are worthless.

“He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind' ; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' " Luke 10:27

A Captured Heart

This post is one I have started to write for two years. I know it needs to be said, but I am afraid of the comments I may get because of it. But God has put it on my heart that it is something that needs to be written. If you are reading this and are offended, please know that I am not posting this to be self-righteous or to make you feel bad. I post it out of love for you and for God. What I say here is not meant to make you angry or defensive… It is only to be thought-provoking and a small piece of advice.

Tomorrow, a movie comes out that many teens are extremely excited about. This movie is one that has been long awaited by many teens who have planned and waited for the midnight showing.

This movie (“Eclipse”) is the third in the Twilight series.

I have skirted around this topic for two years, because I know my view will not be popular. However, I know what it is like to be caught up in some guilty pleasure that I know is sin, yet cannot get away from.

My guilty pleasure is the show “Dancing with the Stars”. It pains me to admit it, and I do not want to, but I have watched the last couple of seasons, and I have watched it go from slightly unclean to extremely raunchy. I have been praying about this pleasure, and God has made it clear to me that it is a waste of time. Not only does it go against many of the Bible’s teachings, but it is filled with sexual tension and immodesty. It is not easy to give up, but I believe it is something evil that should be avoided by everyone.

It is the same way with Twilight. Girls have become so enamored with the idea of vampires, werewolves, and average humans that they have forgotten what reality truly is. They have become so caught up in the books that they overlook the sexual references, the detailed make-out scenes, and the explicit descriptions of body contact, and only think about the “good” aspects of it.

Whether or not you want to believe it, Twilight is emotional PORNOGRAPHY. It is something that draws you in, captures your heart, and makes you forget about the Bible’s teachings. I know many girls who have read the books countless times, and each time they talk about it, they speak of it like it an addiction and obsession. Like drugs or alcohol, these books draw the reader in and make them long for more.

It is sad to watch teenagers, even the Christian ones, become so enamored with something so fake. Vampires are not real, people, so why should you desire them? Vampires have long been associated with the Occult, so why should Christians make-believe that they are harmless? Perhaps they are not real, but they can still be extremely harmful to the hearts and minds of humans.

If Jesus came to your house, do you think he would approve of the Twilight books on your shelves, CD’s in your stereo, and movies in your home? I highly doubt it. If Jesus would go to the movies today do you think he would go to Eclipse?

All you have to do is look at the cover of the first book and see the evil that is inside. The apple on the cover should remind you of the fruit that Satan gave to Eve who gave it to Adam. This fruit is what allowed sin to enter the world. It was a temptation for both Adam and Eve, just like Twilight is a temptation for young men and women.

Matthew 26:41 says, "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." This verse accurately describes the feelings of teens toward Twilight. They do not want to do what is wrong, yet there is something so enticing about these books that they choose them over what is right. They seem harmless at the beginning, yet they become something so addicting, that they become more real to the teens than the Bible itself.

If you have gotten this far, and you have felt a conviction in your heart, then please choose to give up these books. Please do not let them enter your mind and corrupt it. I am not saying that it will be easy for you to give up these books, but it something that God asks everyone to do – Acts 3:19, “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.” Ask the Lord to help you make it through your Twilight “detox” and to give you a time of refreshing and cleansing of your mind and heart.

After choosing to get rid of this area in your life, find something wholesome to replace it. Such as reading all the verses in the Bible about moral filth and immorality, or some good Christian fiction (if you need some suggestions, I can give you some good ones! I read a lot…)

Do not let your heart be captured by the evils presented by the world… Allow your heart to be captured by Jesus, who washes away your sins and allows you to begin anew.

To Save the Children

I have always loved staying in hotels, whether on a vacation or other reason. Recently, I took a trip to Denver with my family, and we stayed in a hotel for two nights. The first thing I noticed when I walked into the bathroom was a sign hanging from the towels. Being a very visual person, I picked it up and read it. The sign talked about how this particular hotel was committed to reducing the amount of water, energy, and waste and that, if I wanted to help them in this plan, I could hang my towel up on the rack signaling the maid that I did not wish for my towel to be washed that day. I did not think much of this sign, until I went out to the bedroom and saw a similar sign lying on the sheets of the bed. For some reason, the signs turned me off. It was not until later that night that I realized why.

This hotel (along with many other places) was so consumed with the fact of saving the amount of energy used and protecting the rain forest, that they were missing something very important. I am not saying that what they are doing is wrong at all…
In fact, I agree that we should be stewards of the things God has given us and not waste the blessings that we have been granted. I think the rainforest is one of the most beautiful things ever created and, while it should be protected, should NOT be at the top of the priority list. What should be of utmost importance? I’m glad you
asked…

The answer would be this: Children.

Why are these people so concerned with the environment, and not the four-thousand babies that are aborted EACH DAY only in America? In my point of view, I feel like we have missed something that should have been placed first on America’s agenda.

Yes, saving water and other resources is a good idea… But it has become more important than saving the children.

50,000,000. That is the number of babies aborted every year here in America. Fifty million babies that were never given a chance to live, to breathe, to cry. Wake up, America! If you must leave behind the project of saving the environment so as to save the lives of unborn babies, than do it! If we use up all our energy, water, and other resources, then so be it! The lives of helpless, beautiful babies are far more important than whether or not to wash a towel after only one use. If America (and other countries) could only direct these projects toward saving children, not the number of sheets washed everyday in the hotels, the silent cry of the babies would be comforted. Abortions are rampant in America, and it is very difficult to watch a place with over 850 hotels worldwide direct their efforts to something with so little meaning.

“The project will support the employment, education and healthcare for the approximately 2,500 people who live there…” This is a quote directly from this hotel’s website, and it is speaking about a rainforest in Brazil. Perhaps we are providing employment, education, and healthcare for people in Brazil, but we are extinguishing the lives of fifty million babies a year.

The unborn children are crying out to you. Will you answer?