Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The Presence of Him

It made me shiver. I was awestruck, scared, and yet very happy. I lifted my hands in worship and just stood there for the entire song wondering what I should do. I felt like I had a choice. I could jump from my ledge of security and take that one step into the completely foreign world of wonder, or I could take a step back and hold onto the familiar.

That was the first time that I had felt God’s presence with absolute certainty. There was no doubt in my mind that God was lifting me in His arms and holding me close to His heart. He was trying to tell me something, but He was asking me to first trust Him completely.

I seriously was about to fall over with the amazement that wracked my body. I was in absolute awe at what I was experiencing, and wanted to just stand still and stay there forever. The decision God was asking me to make left thoughts churning in my head. I wondered what I should do, and I once again felt a gentle nudge from God telling me in no uncertain words that He wanted me to leap into His arms with no doubt left in my body.

This decision was one I have been holding back from for a very long time. I was comfortable where I was in my little bubble, and didn’t want anything to change. Lately, though, I have felt God nudging me toward a deeper relationship with Him.
For a long time, I prayed my normal, rote prayer (“Thank you for this day and for everything you’ve given me. Please help this person and that person…”), and even skimmed my Bible instead of studied it. About six months ago, however, I made the decision to try to work as hard as possible to further my relationship with Jesus.
It was not easy for me to make some of the changes that I did, but it has overall been a wonderful thing.

When I went to church and felt God’s all-consuming presence, I knew that He was pleased with my efforts. I knew that God wanted me to keep drawing closer to Him. I knew that God was there, and that He wanted me to leap off my ledge of comfort and fall into His arms. There was no doubt in my mind that God was there, and I felt like God was confirming my faith over and over again.

That experience has changed something inside me. I no longer want to stay comfortable; I want to spread the love of God so that others may have an experience like that, too. If only I could make people feel God in the way that I did, I am sure even the strongest atheist could believe in my Lord.

So jump off that ledge! Don’t take time to analyze what will happen, just do it! God will catch you in the arms that created the universe. All you have to do is take that first step. He loves you, and will not let you fall. I hope one day you can have an experience like I did. It is amazing and scary at the same time, but I would not trade that one moment for all the chocolate in the world. But my story is not over.

There were so many emotions running through my body, making my fingers tingle and my arms shake a little while raised in worship. I decided to take that step toward the unknown, and I was no longer afraid to do it. As I leapt off my ledge, I could feel God catching me. In that amazing moment, I heard the God of the universe say four words that have resonated throughout my entire being since that experience. All He had to say to me was summed up in those four words, and I have the need to find proof that He exists. I am absolutely certain now, that He is there in heaven and on earth. And that amazing revelation was summed up in four words. Those words were, “Molly, I love you.”


  1. Molly-

    I think you would really enjoy the song by Sara Groves, "Something Changed Inside Me". It fits in perfectly...

    Powerful Molly! Thank you!

  2. May He always reveal Himself to you, my daughter, and may you always have the courage to leap. I love you!